Monday, August 28, 2006


This shot was taken as boredom struck.

This is my left ear now, with two new piercings. I never ever thought I would get more than just two piercings (one on each ear). It was actually a big NO-NO for me sometime ago. But I guess, you can never tell what actually will happen in the future or I suppose, you will never know what kind of person you might change into. I'm not saying I am a totally different person now that I have three piercings just on one ear, but then...I feel that I have somehow evolved.

*sheesh* Well, my point here is, some people change with time and I guess it scares me sometimes. I see the eyes of a stranger on a familiar face. It's definitely tough to adjust to changes.

Life has been rather monotonous these few days for me. Today I felt as though I have achieved nothing although I went for my tutorial and attended three lectures in a row. I think this is the time in life where I seem to just keep doing the things I am supposed to do but I have no idea why I'm doing it. I have lost my drive. I don't really feel that I need to accomplish anything. Sometimes, I don't even know why I should wake up in the mornings. Why can't I just lay there?
Perhaps I am sinking into depression. Perhaps I am facing too many problems that I just can't get myself to face it. Perhaps I need time alone. Perhaps I am just too tired of faking. Perhaps all I want is to show my true feelings and not hide them behind closed doors.
Perhaps I am heartbroken.

Walking home on a quiet street.


Saturday, August 12, 2006

Life with or without decisions?

I feel like I have too few hours in a day. Why? Well, take for example my day yesterday. I had a lecture from 9 am to 10am. Then a 3-hour Chemistry practical from 10 am to 1pm. At 1pm, I had to finish up an assignment in the library (I had to gobble up a sandwhich, standing because I had no time to sit) and then I had another two lectures from 2.15-4.15 pm. After that, just when I thought I had some time to sleep, I was WRONG! After reaching home, I had hardly an hour before I needed to head out to Uni again to watch the Chinese Musical Group's production. It lasted for more than two hours and ended at 10pm or so. Then, I went for dinner (because I was starving) and ended up having about 45 minutes after dinner to relax with my friends before I went to work at 12am to 5.30am! *pheewwww*

Well, if I have so few hours...why am I wasting my time blogging? Come on, give me a break. I want to have at least SOME time to be able to do the things I want to do. I am thinking of quitting my job. But, I am going to miss earning! *sighs* dilemmas.... I don't want to quit because I love the little envelope of money I get every Monday but at the same time, I know if I don't stop working, I won't have time for my studies. I guess earning ain't everything for me now, it's studies, huh?

I guess it's a part of life to make decisions. Somehow, we sometimes regret the decisions we make but we have to live with it for the rest of our lives. How are we to forgive ourselves then? Ok, probably I'm getting too deep in this whole decision thing. But there were some problems (which I do NOT wish to address here) which have been spinning my head around, and I can't seem to solve them as I am too afraid of the big 'D' word. Yeap...Decisions!

I wish I could be a spectator of life. And not be involved in it, having to make decisions which may change my life in the future. Hmmm...oh wait, is our life a life without decisions? If God has already planned a path for us, then is all decisions made by us arranged by him before hand? Can I really just relax and make any decision I want because it is all part of His plan? *faint*

WHaT am I to Do?!?!?!


Monday, August 07, 2006

Blue M&M's...

Nearly a month has passed since my last entry. There HAS been changes since.

1. I've got a new hair cut.....

I have always wanted to go for a more boyish look....but the stylist won't seem to allow me to go for it. This was the shortest it went.

2. My Hawker's buddy, David is no longer working. He's gone back to Malaysia. It's sad....Miss his lame jokes...hehe...

This is the farewell. That's David in Green on the right. Well, we call him by his surname, Chew for obvious reasons. See the guy at the front? He's David too. There WERE more people. Seemed to have vanished from this photo. Somehow.

3. I have new past times...

That's Hubert (my roomie) and I on a day where we tried too hard to entertain ourselves. Yes, I'm in one of his really weird boxers (It's new! He has never worn it! I wouldn't have put it on otherwise!!! kekeke) and sweater. It was all HIS idea! Melbourne can get really boring sometimes.....No kidding.

4. I am officially a year older....(unfortunately, not much wiser)

I turned 19. Feel depressed as I am now in my FINAL teenage year. How can that be? I want to be carefree....I am not ready to take up more responsibilities!!! *sighs*

Well, the only good side of birthdays are the presents and celebration with friends. Here's one really special gift. A whole jug of BLUE M&M's! I have always liked the blue M&M's. Seeing a whole jug of it...........I just love it. Thanks =)

Thank you, my friends for the other pressies. In fact, every single one meant a lot to me.

Those are pretty much the main changes which occured.

Moving on, here is an IMPORTANT reminder to my dear friends: Indulgence kills! But who can resist.....


Or this???

Yes, I have pretty much been indulging in pretty much every sweet looking thing, pretty much too many times then I should be. The result? Looking pretty much the way I don't want to look like. I need a gym! Thank god tennis competitions are starting this week. Need the workout. Badly!

Nineteen and independent.